Wot I loved today: Not owning a Kindle

20140102-115537.jpgMy friend Parkin likes to laugh at me. He thinks I’m useless in most respects. He’s wrong, of course, but he’s very funny so whenever he attacks me I’m laughing too much to punch him in the face or at very least argue back.

When he learned that I do not own a Kindle he was absolutely disgusted. ‘Let me get this straight, Robinson. When you pack your suitcase to go on holiday – that time when you need to save on space and weight – you pack a pile of big, heavy books?’


‘Do you also write shopping lists on a piece of slate and drive around in a horse and cart?’

‘Shut up.’

‘You’re a WRITER! How can you not own a Kindle?’

‘Parkin, I don’t want a Kindle. I love books. Proper, real, papery books that smell lovely.’

‘Oh God’ His eyes narrowed. ‘Hang on. How do you read eBooks?’

I paused. I knew how this was going to go.

‘On my iPhone,’ I muttered.

The abuse lasted for a very long time.

Well, Parkin dear, up yours. I am reading Michele Gorman’s eBook Bella Summer Takes a Chance at present and the iPhone format is suiting me perfectly. I de-brighten the screen so I don’t hurt my eyes and I swipe every fifteen seconds. The font size is perfect and none of Michele’s very funny book is lost on me. I found myself thinking earlier, I really must work out a better way of reading this book. And then I thought, WHY? Why do I need to update my life? This arrangement suits me perfectly!

E voila. Today, I love reading books on my iPhone. AND I DON’T BLOODY WELL CARE.

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